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Pun block
Protects you from harmful effects of Twisted Titles.
High Noon
11:59 a.m.
D'Arcy Selwood '47
Happy Grails to You
Roy and Dale go on a quest.
Brian Healy '69
Seasonal Mooo Disorder
Sad cow disease.
Dave Peterzell '83
Bud and breakfast
Café for hangover victims.
Joe Traynor '57
Move in the Time of Cholera
Good advice.
Adrienne Hill
Bar and Peace
Let's settle this over a few drinks.
Phil Gericke, M.A. '60, Ph.D. '65
Mice Krispies
Snap, crackle, and pop for your kitten.
Brad Glanville '68
Floppy dish
Served at a Dada picnic.
Carol Kohli '73
Children of a Lesser Bod
"Baywatch" wannabes.
Joe Traynor '57
Hack the Knife
Oh, the shark bytes....
Roy Abendroth '82
Say it with noses
Advice to lovelorn Eskimo.
Alan Fibish '52, Ed.D. '71
The Mama Sutra
Oedipus's favorite book.
Dave Peterzell '83
Town without Pita
Don't you falafel to see a place so culturally deprived?
Patricia Leslie '96
Animal Firm
Positively refuses to visit the vet.
Marilynn Forcee '66
My Finny Valentine
Smitten by a mermaid.
Jim Blewer '41
Autumn heaves
Colorful display often seen on fall mornings after excessive binging.
Joe Traynor '57
Taming of the Screw
Use a power drill.
Chris Argentos
Never Been Pissed
Biography of a Zen master.
Jeff Williams '75
| Plea market
The D.A.'s office.
Doug Raymond '65
Jack the Nipper
As a young boy.
Jim Blewer '41
The Dane of my existence
Hamlet pays tribute to his Mom.
Max Gatov '36
Ode on a Grecian URL
Classic poetry on the Internet.
Alan Fibish '52, Ed.D. '71
Mace the Nation
Law enforcement runs amok.
Paul Purdom '50
Spit happens
View of a baseball dugout.
Nan Sparrow '47
Enternet
Abandon reality, all ye who enter here....
Carol Kohli '73
Boogie Tights
The censored Fonteyn-Nureyev tapes.
Dal Leite '66
Microsofa
Government breakup dictates new business venture.
Byron Wiegand '52
The Last Time I Saw Parts
Peeping Tom gets 30 days.
Max Gatov '36
A Lear in Provence
Cordelia's daddy takes a vacation.
Jeff Williams '75
Great Mall of China
Hong Kong.
Chris Argentos
Pillsbury Toughboy
Punches back.
Richard Rott, MLIS '81
Absession
One hour of sit-ups.
Joe Traynor '57 |
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| In the Twisted mail box: Eleanor Cottrell Eagan ’42 sends a twisted title from the sports section of the L.A. Times, “Hole that Tiger,” and gives thanks to all twisters, “especially Traynor and Blewer, for more than their share of good wholesome Cal humor.” We question three of her last four words. On twisted relationships: Margaret Cooney Walton, BSN ’47, reports that she and Jim Blewer went to the same high school (Fremont, in Oakland); a man (we won’t say who) writes in wanting to get the address of a woman twister (“she’s an old friend”—sure, pal); and Lee Pritchard ’56 says, “I look forward to reading Twisted Titles when each issue arrives, much to my wife’s chagrin.” Wipe that chagrin off your faces and send us your high school-level titles (of books, movies, or whatever), changing one letter only, and adding a snappy underline, to: Twisted Titles, California Monthly, Alumni House, Berkeley, CA 94720. The Title title was sent in by the well-guarded Dave Peterzell ’83; we include it, even though we’re not quite sure what it means (harmful effects?). |
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